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Re: Shinko's Quest For The Ages (Open)

There is, I am in the process of getting him back but they kept him away for so long he doesn't remember home. So it has to be I have him a day a week. Then two days, then three and more. THEN I can have a few hours I can be alone with him. Add the hours eventually.
By the end of the year I home to have him 7 days a week.

I saw him. No one believes me cause I mostly had dreams of me growing up, my memories. But right at the end before I woke up he told me I needed to wake up. I feel better because I always wondered for so long if there was a after life or if Nick was ok. A lot of people would always try to say oh you go to hell if you are gay. But it was too bright and happy for that to be hell where I was at and where he is at now.

I do remember Lilly! =)
10 years...yeah that sounds right actually. The first time I ever came on here I was 15, so has been 10 years!

I tried drawing on the computer, I've been having a hard time. My hands used to be so steady but now they shake. I cant hear music but I can feel it. I turn it up and can feel the vibrations on the ground, but I won't lie...I miss singing and music. But I've been typing more.

So addicted to my phone though.
Totally have the Harry Potter APP

What have you been up to in your life Lilly?

Re: Shinko's Quest For The Ages (Open)

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Sorry got a lot going on with life.

I hope you do! Even if he doesn't remember home I hope he remembers you like the comfort when he's with you.

I believe that there is an after life, heaven or hell don't know but there is something. Being bay goes to hell? Well they are the ones to go to hell! These people pisses me off! What is wrong with being gay? Two people love each other. Besides better then people pretending to be nice and pretend %$%$£ ugg! Anyway getting away from the topic.
Do miss Zex but at least he's at a better place where he's happy ^^ Still remember the day when you told me he passed away and how I burst into tears and freaked my husband out. But yeah.... *sigh* Life.....

Keep trying for the drawing. Maybe it'll get better. Just takes time. I can't imagine from being able to hear and to not hearing anything >x< So any good story line you got going?

lol I'm addicted to my app games at one point but now I'm trying to focused more on coding, bullet journal, anime, craft... Ok... I'm trying a lot of stuff. So my life not sure if I did tell you I got married. So this year will be our 5th year and we are going to do something a bit special like going to a posh restaurant! After so many years of saving we bought our own house and currently got a cat. Trying to start our little family but so far no sign of pregnancy :( Makes me bit depress cause most of my friend got a kid now but I'm trying to be positive. So yeah enjoying life as much as I can really cause it can be so short.

One thing I do want to try is to start my craft business but I'm finding hard to get it started with full time job and other things.

Re: Shinko's Quest For The Ages (Open)

It is, I don't think about it a lot to be honest but I do sometimes.

For us we knew it was coming but he didn't want anyone to really know. The sicker he got the more he came onto Roliana to deal with not being able to go to school. For a while we didn't think he was going to not make it but he just kept getting worse.
He would feel the worst when he couldn't come on though, I'd tell him he is ridiculous and everyone would understand but no. He liked making people smile and honestly it made him happy to pretend he was fine. It was a shock to everyone on here I guess but the truth was he was sick a long time.

XD My husband immediately gets me to shut up when I start because he knows how it ends. My emotions are off the roof too sometimes.

It's like I get angry and I can't figure out why I'm so angry and upset. I just am at the tiniest things

I did have a story...but I'm not sure how to really keep it going.

Years ago I was best friends with my buddy. I was Shinko, she wanted to be Saki. She moved away and I was alone. I wanted to do a coming of age type of story of Shinko disappearing, and the friendship that held the two together gets Saki to look for Shinko and eventually find her...but when she does everything has changed and they may not even be friends anymore but enemies.
Add magic, sword fighting and different worlds and that stuff lol
THat's the main part of it. Shinko is kidnapped and brainwashed, while Saki looks for her desperately.

You'll get pregnant. There's loads of things to try and stuff you could do to help your chances. My sister has been trying for two years before she got pregnant with her daughter. A doctor can help too, I wish the best of luck to you. It makes me so mad, being in the system taking classes you are forced to take classes with some of the worst parents.

=) When the time comes I bet you'll be a great mom. It'll come, you're still young.

What crafting do you do?

Re: Shinko's Quest For The Ages (Open)

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He did mention a few times that he is ill and and how he hasn't gotten better for a while. But me was like "he'll get better, he has to" so yeah... He does make me smile ^^ Pain will always be there when I think of him being gone but I'll keep going.

lol My emotion off the roof when I'm near my period time. Mostly stress about house not being clean, like any other time I'm fine. XD

What kind of ending did you want though? One person dead? Happy ending? Maybe that will help you towards getting it somewhere?
I can't write story to save my life XD

We will see a doctor in a few months time cause when we went to see a doctor he said they can only help after we been trying for a year :/ One thing I know is I need to lose some weight cause people said that will help. Also not young any more I'm 31 *sigh* Then again these days people become a mom when they are in their 30s now.

Oh yeah the system... *sigh* It's only getting worse.

I do crochet :D That's my main. Then I'm trying other stuff like cross stitch, embroidery and knitting :D

Re: Shinko's Quest For The Ages (Open)

I've been on mine for like....since October last year. I had a IUD put in thinking it would be awesome. I have sicklic vomitting syndrome, and every month I would have a episode on my period where I would throw up and be in so much pain I would go to the ER. Years to diagnose but every month without fail it was so bad.
But my tummy won't heal, doctor keeps saying to wait since my stomach is complicated anyway....
But I've been bleeding since it's been put in back in october. I made a appointment for a different doctor to try and get it out.
I understand emotion lol

31 isn't old for being a mommy! =) You're still plenty young enough! Have you guys looked up online things that could help? Like him changing his undies to boxers from breifs and trying to stay away from heat in that area, diet changes can help and everything too. I know for me to have my son when we decided to get pregnant when I didn't at first I tried magic.

Well...I'm deciding if I wanted a series...I used to know the answer to most of my own questions a few years ago but I feel like I forgot a lot of my own story. I was thinking it would end in the death of Shinko, but then it doesn't open the possibilities for more to the story so now I'm wondering if I should change it a bit.

I only know basic sewing, I can't do anything fancy.

I'm sorry for late reply, We had our recent DCS CPS meeting and they have been saying for months it's up to us up to us just can't leave ME alone with my son because I take pain medicine now. Reason I got IUD too, I don't want to get pregnant again until we plan it and I can get off the meds.

But my husbands mother, who has my son is a huge addict. That they don't know, because if they knew he would be in foster care instead. Well she is so bad she goes through her medicine like in a few days. So she withdraws and hasn't wanted Dante lately.

I can't legally be alone with him, so she decides she just doesn't want him and I'm stuck with him.

Which I don't mind!
But....I haven't been going online because I"ve been paranoid lol...>_> With what's gone on in my life, you just wouldn't believe the ways they find out crap. Just know my text messages, and phone calls are watched too. They don't know I have a computer for years I did not, so I have no indication that they check me anyway.

Re: Shinko's Quest For The Ages (Open)

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Sorry life got a bit busy.

Aww.... there is so many illness in this world that we still don't understand. I mean just even the brain! No one really can understand how it works and such.
Hope a different doctor will get some sort of result.

I'm on a diet now so I'm hoping to lose some weight. Then husband took a test just so it's not him which it isn't. It's just me and my unregulated period really so I've been taking temperature test every morning to see if that will help. Oh and he likes boxers lol

Well... if you kill off a character it will be hard to carry on the story. But then you can have like another character discover her and go like a trip to find her story and such?

That's horrible.... I know a friend when she was pregnant social service was to her like as soon as the kid is born they are taking him away from her. She fought her corner, they didn't take the baby away but they keep saying the will. But she fought her way and prove them wrong. This is all because she's got depression. I'm like her son is keeping her in a better place! So it's just wrong thy are taking him away from her! Anyway don't think they said anything now cause the kid is like 4 now.

My life just not a lot really. I'm starting to look for a new job cause this place jobs is like a rare thing and I'm fed up waiting for one. I waited cause I know if I apply in this place I will defo get it cause I've been with them for a very long time and they know me. Just.... *sigh* I need to stop waiting cause I've been waiting for a year now and I need to say enough is enough. I need to drag myself to look for a job.

Re: Shinko's Quest For The Ages (Open)

SO SORRY! My computer died and then I tried to get on with my phone and for some reason maybe I was forgetting my password but it wasn't working at all. But my old email I didn't have either. I had to contact the admin and prove it was me.

I'm on a diet too. I have my throwing up and stuff but I have been gaining weight. I realize when I feel good, I eat too much to make up for not eating the other times so been trying to work on that!

The point of view shifts slowly from one to the other, so I'm thinking I could keep the main character alive. Most of it she could be looking for her friend, only by the time she finds her its too late and she is a much darker person.
I'm working on a fanfiction right now, to better my writing before actually tackling the book. Practice getting details and just putting my thoughts together. It takes longer now than it used to.

I'm not going to try and lie about when Dante was first born and why they took him. We weren't married, much different people. My husband and I both changed, he has done so much to be sober and be the wonderful provider he is now. At the start, he wasn't and I wouldn't leave him. I didn't leave him, because he was trying so hard to change and actually putting the effort in. I wasn't going to leave him with our son gone, we were in this together.

But Dante turns 3. Sober and working, we are married and have our own place. The reasons they came back was because we got married. I take pain medicine so automatically I am a danger to my son. It's a small dose for my back but that's enough for them I guess. My husband can't protect him from me if we are married.

Even today, case worker was saying she is done.

I can' t be alone, I can't take him to the doctor or his appointments because I can't drive him. I can't choose his doctor, the one I've been trying to change I can't. I have him two days a week and only when my husband is off work.

Oh yeah, they're done with us. We have to keep doing this, she won't say how long. Keeps saying it's up to us but when we try to take a step forward it's wrong.

I'm looking for a lawyer. It's ridiculous, i feel like my parental rights have been taken away. NO PAPERWORK, nothing! I'm trying not to be angry but this makes me so mad! They were saying I don't take him to his apoointments. Well he is with his fracken grandmother! I don't have custody.

Oh we don't think you would take him if you did have him.

YOU WON'T EVEN LET ME DRIVE HIM. HOW CAN I, when John works and I can't take him!?

Re: Shinko's Quest For The Ages (Open)

Glad you got back :D

I'm trying this app that keep counts of what food I have per day and how much calories I've eaten and how much I got left that I can eat. Was really good cause today someone bought in cookies and donuts and I didn't touch any of it! I'm so happy with myself, cause usually I'm there XD

I remember he was on drugs and such and it go into Dante's system. After that I remember you being really angry and was thinking of leaving him, then Donte got taken away.... after that you weren't on.

I don't get this social worker it's like she's trying to find anything she can and use it against you! I though they were there to help the kid to stay with family and only take them away if they are in real danger! I mean what the hell!!!! I hope you do find a lawyer that will help you cause that is freaking ridiculous! You got a right to be angry cause you have come back and trying to fight so you can be the mother you want to be!

Oh my word! I'm really angry for you now!

Re: Shinko's Quest For The Ages (Open)

What app was it?

I was angry, but you just have no idea the hell. I did leave him for a small bit, when they left we worked on our relationship because we wanted our son to have both his parents.

They would pull emails, text, phone calls from us both. It's...I don't know.
The situation right now is they won't go to court. It was voluntary 90 days we signed to do what they say..back in November. They said if it didn't settle we would go to court.
But everytime I request to go to court, they would threaten that Dante would be put into foster care if we even tried.

Everyone who thinks you have privacy, you don't. At any time someone if they tried could pull everything up. For years we kept thinking "Well no, that's a infringement on our rights."
But their policy which I've been told to my face, "You are guilty until proven innocent."
In Arizona, I don't know about elsewhere but a few years ago someone sued DCS. It was a kid that got emacipated from his parents, he had a lot of money. He called DCS because he didn't want ot be with his parents. They didn't help.

Then DCS was revised. They do NOT have to answer to state. They have the same power as police as in if they want to search you, they can. And will, doesn't matter if it's imoral or wrong to do that to people. They do it anyway.

Step by step my family has been there, and none of it makes sense.
That's why I want to talk to a lawyer and have been calling different ones.
They made up their mind about me, I'm not safe.

I've been to the classes for parents. There are plenty of people who shouldn't be parents, they usually stop the classes or just...won't accept that there is the possibility that maybe there was a reason the child was taken.
It's just, I don't understand why crack so much harder on us when we are doing everything. It's like they decided he wasn't safe with us, and is just trying to make it seem like we don't care or that we neglect him.

It's so bad here, John's best friends kids are in the system. But there are no more group homes or foster homes, these kids are sleeping in their DCS offices. A little over half the children here are taken away. It's impossible to NOT know someone who is dealing with them here.

I've been starting to have trouble with Dante too. He knows something is wrong because he wants to be with us. He has been starting to shake in anger/frustration, hitting his head, it's starting to really take a toll on him. Every time I have to leave him over at his grandma's, man it hurts.
You love your baby so much, your heart physically hurts. Every time you hear them cry or get upset, your emotions and mama bear protection mode jumps into play. His birthday is the 12th this month.

We are going to do a Moana birthday party. He absolutely LOVES Moana. We have a cousin that looks exactly like her. She is coming to the party dressed up, I'm excited. ... e=5BD3F443
When he was born ... e=5C0DCDDC
1st birthday ... e=5C0FA286
YODA! ... e=5C0EB087
2nd birthay
on a lighter note, gotta love him. <3

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