Re: -- Suicide Help -- - Sat Nov 30, 2013 5:32 pm
I just want to be by myself, completely isolated, on a far off uncharted island, where I'd have all the necessities one should need to last a lifetime, and enough literature to occupy my days. Nothing would make me happier than to never have to interact with anyone. I wouldn't even need internet, or any other technology for that matter. When I say alone, I mean alone.
However, this isn't really possible, I don't think. So the closest thing to it, would be dying.
I don't exactly want to end my life, I just don't want to continue living the one I am now. I keep waiting for the better years to come, but it seems like eternities of misery are passing. Like I'm halfway through swimming across the ocean, in the dead center with three choices:
a. swim back, let the distance I've covered be for nothing, end as a waste.
b. continue swimming, through the unknown with the possibility of never reaching the other side.
c. just give up and let myself drown.
It's like, I've come too far to give up, but I don't know if I'm strong enough to go on.
It's all so overwhelming. Most of the time I wish I could just go to sleep for a few years and hope things are better when I wake up. I so want to be happy, and I know it's possible, but just not right now, because of certain circumstances. I have to be patient, but waiting is so hard.
Re: -- Suicide Help -- - Tue Apr 08, 2014 10:49 am
Re: -- Suicide Help -- - Tue Jul 28, 2015 3:22 am
When i was 13 me and my 2 friends watch a guy jump from 12th floor try go for dumpster but he missed it was worse thing to see
and still scares me to this day last thing rember befor hit ground looked at us his eyes where black like and emptiness him before
he took his own life he even had kid he did bc his wife/gf was leaving him for a guy in wheel chair it was really sad
my mom and dad had clean up mes bc worked for place it happen
he grab my mom leg it creeped her out
Re: -- Suicide Help -- - Mon Feb 20, 2017 1:24 pm
From personal experience, I've actually called suicide hotlines, and they literally put me on HOLD. Literally I got a voicemail saying, "please stay on the line, someone will be available shortly, we care about you." This went on for about 10-15minutes before I hung up.
I think they need to come up with a better system for taking suicide calls... Death does not wait, and each ticking minute counts with those negative thoughts in your head...
Re: -- Suicide Help -- - Tue Aug 15, 2017 9:05 am
Even if I knew these resources were available when my suicidal ideation (is that the correct term for it?) began, I don't think it would have helped. I was 12 when it started (just wondering if anyone would care or miss me if I dropped dead in the middle of the hallway). Even with my two attempts, and the fact that recently I bought pills to attempts a third time, I don't feel like any of these resources would help me. For me it's just trying to find some reason to keep going. Like since I am in a relationship, not following through because I know he would blame himself. When I was house sitting it was not following through because then no one would be home to care for the cats. It's literally finding any reason, no matter how small or insignificant to some it may seem, it's reason enough to keep going. I don't know any good resources to help others in a similar situation, the only thing I can think of is if you know someone you trust to that degree, talk to them. You may find that they meet you with understanding and compassion, and will be willing to be that lifeline if you need it.
Re: -- Suicide Help -- - Sun Dec 31, 2017 2:19 am
I know I'm necro posting, but I'm hoping @_Haiku_ will add this.
Roliana got e-mailed asking if you would be willing to add the following information or not:
This is the message:
I hope you're doing well. I came across your site while researching
established resources and thought I’d reach out.
I’m a team member at rehabcenter.net, an organization connecting people
seeking treatment to the resources they need.
I saw you had a very helpful links/resources section here:
http://www.roliana.com/viewtopic.php?f=27&t=197904 and thought our
organization would be a great addition.
Do you mind adding our page:
http://www.rehabcenter.net/free-mental- ... resources/ to your
Thank you so much for your help!
"I'd been responsible for a lot of shenanigans in my life,
but this was the first time I'd ever actually rendered an entire room speechless."
- Adrian Ivashkov
(Silver Shadows - a Bloodlines novel by Richelle Mead)
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